I'm not really here

But I had to share this with you. I remembered this song for some reason, and well, I had to figure it out. Nobody else here Chez Nemoid seems to remember. Do you?

By the by, I have no idea why it's set to anime. Anime means, um, nothing to me.

On the road

Don't know if I'll be blogging for a few days. Am off to visit Nemoid and Jamie. Intended to leave yesterday afternoon, but was suffering some, ahem, gastric distress and figured that would be a BAD time to get in the car for 6 hours. Ya know?

I've overpacked for once. Usually I'm so lean with my clothes that I end up wearing the same thing 30 times in a row. Not so into that!

On the way, I'll be stopping off at a trailer (a singlewide, KW!), where I will pick up a free DVD player from Freecycle. I will finally get to watch Jerry's birthday movies!

Fun!

I may have had a missed connection a couple of days ago. Am trying to figure it out. Heh.

Note to self

Dear Stew:
Before you leave today, make sure you do all these things. You'll feel better and be happier upon your return.

• Water the garden. You'll be gone for a week. Water it deep!
• Email the neighborhood gardeners and offer up any and all cucumbers that will be ripening. Since you've been getting (and eating) 3-5 nicely sized pickling cukes every DAY, you might want to just offer them up. Tomatoes? NO! Make that clear.
  
• Take out the trash and recycling. You're so bad at remembering this. It's a good thing you're cute.
  
• Pack. Don't forget your meds, your glasses, and a bathing suit. Anything else could be purchased on the fly, but really you don't want to do that, so be mindful of what clothes your activities will require.
  
• Road Food: pick all cucumbers you can find to take with you. Also bring your new cooler and the ice packs.
• Tie up your tomatoes again, with more stakes. Next year use your large tomato cages for your indeterminates.
• Map your route and print at work. You don't have a printer.
  
• Return emails from your roommate search. Explain to people coming from other countries that you really need to meet the person before you decide.
  
• Note to the next-door-neighdog's person: thanks for offering to take the mail in. Feel free to eat cucumbers.
  
• Mow lawn? If there's time...otherwise it will be extreme when you come back.
• Make bed. Clear the kitchen table. Wash all dishes. Put all paperwork in one location. The floor next to the front door is not an appropriate receptacle. Put shoes away. Clear off bathroom counters. Basically, CLEAN THE FUCK UP!
  
• Figure out if there's any construction along the way that you should avoid at all costs.
  
• Buy a razor for your legs, since your other torture device isn't particularly effective on the wispy leg hairs. The coarse ones? All gone. Unfortunately the legs are not smooth. You want smooth. I know you don't want to, but please consider the bikini zone. If not for yourself then for others. You are bringing your suit, you know.
  
• Take the bottles and cans out of your car. Again, your recycling is admirable, but it's not fun to have the entire passenger seat floorboard covered. That's where you need to stash your cooler and such.
  
• Call your stepmother. She needs you.
  

Love,

Stew

...and witty and GAY!

I bought some pedicure implements today and did myself right up. Soaked the feetsies, trimmed the nails, rubbed the callouses off as best I could with torture devices, and then finally polished the nails right up like a sack of potatoes*.

They are now a pearly cotton-candy color. Very sweet and 5 year old.

I also depilated where necessary, and treated a minor chin blemish.

I have five books on tape (CD), way too many cucumbers to snack on, and nothing packed. I leave on my trip tomorrow and clearly I'm not going to be ready to go straight from work.

Hey Nemoid and Jamie! See you soon!



* "like a sack of potatoes" here is an intensifier. In this sentence, you could substitute "good." Blame my sister for its coining shift in meaning. Silly kook!

One Local Summer Meal #1

I've not made a local meal yet this week! Normally I'd use the weekend to make a nice, gorgeous meal out of the locally sourced ingredients I've been gathering. But...I'm going out of town. Tomorrow!!! Which means I need to make a meal....TODAY!

I warned Liz that I'd probably be going out into the garden and eating straight off of the plants for some of these entries. I'm just so bad at meals.

So. I'm preparing it right now. It's gonna be lunch. But I promise my dinner will be like, an ice-cream sandwich and some diet Coke. Much less conducive to a change for local ingredients!

On the Lunch Menu:
Garden Vegetable soup

Water (from the office water cooler. Sadly, I'm not sure this is local. But the tap tastes like absolute nasty horrid industrial waste at the office. I drink tap at home)
Salt (condiment exemption)
Pepper (condiment exemption)
Running onions (Garden. 0 miles)
Green Beans (Garden. 0 miles)
Yellow Squash (Garden. 0 miles)
Beet (Garden. 0 miles.)

If I'd planned I'd have been able to add my chicken base as seasoning, along with some garden greens such as swiss chard and sorrel and some herbs. But NOooooooooooo. I had to wait until the very last minute to make my meal! And have to make do with what I have!

Boil the water in the office microwave. Cram in the veggies as best as possible. Let boil until the beans are done to your liking. Everything else will be mush, but that's fine.

YUM!

Cucumber "Salad"

Cucumbers. Sliced. Salt. Pepper. Onion.


Overall:
1) Good soup!
2) Homegrown cucumbers don't really need anything on them to be tasty.
3) Next time? Don't be so spartan.
4) Stew? Learn to plan. K? Thanks.

p.s. sorry no camera still!

Dichotomy

On the one hand, I am sad that I've been unable to find my camera.

On the other hand, I was looking for the camera in order to take a picture of my

FIRST TOMATO!

impulse control

Hi!

(waves furiously!)

I swear I'm not crazy! A little kooky, yeah, absolutely. Entirely open to the blog about things that are on my mind? Mostly. Not entirely, if you can imagine that, though.

Anyhoo, let's just stash that blip of horridness aside, why don't we? Chin up, cheerio, pull those bootstraps up!

(Yes, I have an appointment)

I had a thought this morning:

Savory bread pudding made from leftover pizza. Is there any way this could be done without being all soggy and nast?

Apparently the Carolina Hurricanes called my workplace, wanting to have a community relations opp or some such with some teens. The captain, according to my boss, who has season tickets, is single, cute, my age and has three kids. I'm thinking I'll be involved in this new relationship between our organizations!

All together now: AWWWWWWWW

I've been deeply lonesome for some time. There's a distinct lack of intimacy in my life on any level at all. Most of the time I accept it pretty stoically, but from time to time it just kills me.

Today I helped a friend move. I hadn't seen this group of friends in toto for a long while, so there was lots of catch-up to play. For some reason, I openly copped to being pretty sick of my loner status. The more I thought about it, the more I kind of felt pretty shitty, and then I almost cried. Remembering it makes me teary, too!

On the way home from the move (which, aside: OY! they got the truck stuck!) I thought about moving back to Michigan, because at least there I'd have my family around. Even with my very extra super closest friends I have some kind of barrier to intimacy. I don't have anyone I can call no matter what time of day or night it is. I mean, that's not strictly true. I don't have anyone that I'd feel OK with calling, though. I know that's about me. That's not about my friends. I bet that any and every last one would be OK with a middle-of-the-night emergency call. I mean, shoot, I'd be happy to help in the same situation.

When I mentioned it to my mom, the maybe, what-if, huh, should I thoughts towards going back to where I've vowed I'd never go back again, she jumped with excitement. Audibly, anyway.

I dunno. The growing season is SO short. The people are SO conservative. The town is SO boring. The economy is SO shitty. But the wilderness is equally beautiful. And my family is even more important. And face it, how can you not miss THIS?

Sigh.

Well, I did get to hold a very cute baby last weekend who made it her job to give everyone kisses.

That was good.

Draaaaaa ha ha ha ma!

Just thought I'd share some of my MySpace messages with you! These are all from different men. I've only had the pleasure of meeting one of them. Can you figure out which one?

*************************

Date:	Jun 14, 2007 11:54 AM
Subject:	hi
Body:	I know i'm an ugly fucken ,son of a bitch,filthy irish bastard pig. Could you at least confirm my existence.Ok we are not a good match! What the the fuck are you talking about?

***************************

Date:	Jun 21, 2007 11:53 AM
Subject:	HI
Body:	YOU ARE A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN AND I WOULD LIKE TO MARRY YOU .BUT THE MATTER IS AM FROM AFRIKA I LIVE HERE.

*************************

Date:	May 26, 2007 4:47 AM
Subject:	Hello Miss Sexy,
Body:	Hello Miss Sexy, How are you doing?Well i am Joe well i was actually browsing through some profiles then i saw your profile well to be frnk with i was emotionalised about your pic and your profile and i decided to say HELLO to you..Well i am a single looking for the right woman that can love me for who i am..Well i will be glad if you can reply me back to my mail or to this same site..This is my mail or if you do use yahoo IM you can add me to your list..This is it..joe_CHANGED@yahoo.com..This is my ID...joe_CHANGED..I will be expecting you soon.. JOE

**************

Date:	Jun 21, 2007 11:59 AM
Subject:	hi
Body:	i search careful and responsible woman who enjoy a life together with me . Is this person you? I'm seeking a serious long term relationship and more. Someone special to capture my heart and knows how to handle it with care, one who will cherish me and be willing to share life's greatest ys and sorrows. Someone who's willing to spoil, pamper and love me unconditionally, whom is kind, sincere, honest, passionate, loyal, sense of humor, loving and wants a lifetime of passion., am looking for someone to love as well, Capture my heart.Someone kind and affectionate, fun and optimistic, motivated and active. A real person, who likes themself and is comfortable with who they are, even if not where they are. Someone who can keep up with me, challenge me and inspire me. And who isintelligent, has idea pekkyneedlove: may be creative and has needs and/or expectations to be fullfilled.I'm looking for my soulmate to share lifes dreams with, someone who still believes in romance,fun,and is a true gentle woman at heart.But i find it difficult to get someone that will be able to capture my heart,win my heart cos there are no honest man out there anymore. just wanna give it a trial now..but tell me if i ever give my heart to you maybe i say i want us to live together and u accept will u ever give up on me in terms of trouble though i pray for no trouble but u know no body knows tomorrow.. are u gonna stay with me for better for worse..?i really love a sincere caring woman who is ready to love me forever, i hate games, you can email me to my personla email, jeff.CHANGED@yahoo.com jeff CHANGED

Passing thought

The place I get my car's work done has a page at Car Talk. I've always had a bit of a crush on one of the guys there. Apparently I'm not alone, as one of the reviewers referred to him as Jim, the sexy, Zen mechanic.

Independent grocers

I went over to Sean's house this morning to drop off an old coffee grinder of mine he's planning to use to grind up eggshells for his worms. He lives about as close to SuperCompare as I do to Locopops, so I figured I'd gear up for One Local Summer, which begins Sunday.

I'm one of the lucky OLS-ers, with (Hey Ols! I'm an OLSer now!) easy access to locally-milled, inexpensive, widely-sold flour. So I got some more. Also, picked up some breakfast sausage. It's been a long time (years!) since I've had sausage biscuits and gravy, so that might be my first meal.

I worry about meat in any eating locally I do. I'm what I call a non-practicing vegetarian. What that means is that when I don't think about meat, I have no problem eating and enjoying it. Eating local necessarily creates some mindfulness (which is a good thing), and with meat, well, EEEEEEEEEEEEEEK! The veggie in me comes out. So. We'll see what happens...

This is what I picked up today:
• Southern Biscuit flour, self-rising.
• Sausage. Brand? No clue. Can't remember, except that it's from NC. It's one of those paper-packaged ones.
• 2 dozen eggs
• Mount Olive Sweet Gherkins
• Canned tomatoes with vidalia onions
• Anne's dumplings
• Anne's Chicken base
• Maola ice-cream sammies
• Maola chocolate ice cream (pint)
• Maola butter pecan ice cream (pint)
• Maola Vitamin D Milk (just a quart. I've got raw coming!)
• Blueberries
• A sweet potato

Supercompare really carries quite a variety of local foods, but not the micro-local ones. You've got to go to Whole Foods (or the dairy itself...Whole Foods is closer for me) for extremely local dairy. A farmer's market (or CSA subscription) is the only place to reliably pick up stuff from closer than 100 miles.

Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you.

My computer is old. REALLY small amount of memory: 256 megs of RAM. That's 25% of what comes standard these days on the new version of my bottom of the (Apple) line laptop.

I'm not one to really give a shit about brands (she says, hypocritically, considering that she just copped to having a branded laptop). Used to be? Sure. Especially in high school it just thrilled me to have the right, popular *thing* whatever it was. In 1987 (shortly before dancing to the featured music at a horrible, and very empty at 9 p.m., disco), I purchased a (fake) Louis Vuitton purse, for example.

But I've changed, mostly. I look for the best quality at the lowest price.

So far? This post is very demonstrative of how my mind jumps from topic to topic. The reason I opened Blogger in the first place is that I'm in the middle of watching The Corporation. I've many thoughts about the documentary, and my old computer is making the watching kind of difficult. The DVD drive is sticky; I have to jerryrig the slot to allow the disks ingress and egress. This involves a moist Q-tip. I also max the memory out with one program. I can run Firefox to browse (for a while....then it hangs up and crashes) but not when I've got Mail or the DVD player open.

And so then I noticed that I was blathering on (as I do) about the computer being old and an Apple. And I digressed on to branding.

All of this jumbled mess of emotional reaction to the movie leads to my Official Review:

The Corporation made me mad and sad and ever more jaded about people and their motivations. I mean, it paints a picture of human nature that is SO bleak I wonder why anyone bothers to do anything.

Makes me e'er more interested in homesteading. Urban homesteading, I guess. (I have no response* to my use of the poetic "e'er")

By the way, I got the DVD at the library, where I had gone to try to check out Frontier House. Which is only on VHS at my public library. And was checked out.

The End.

*This is what we used to say to mean "Whatever!".

(... I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time. )

Heall yeah

It's legal to buy raw milk off the farm in South Carolina.

I'll be driving through South Carolina on my way to Georgia.

Guess I'll be making some inquiries and playing with my route.

One Local Summer

A blog-friend of Jamie's, Liz, does this "thing" that's like the Eat Local Challenges I've done in the past. It's called One Local Summer. One dinner a week, all local, all summer.

I signed up, seeing as I have a garden and all. Easy peasy.

:::blows on knuckles and polishes on chest:::
However, Liz has had a HUGE turnout of people signing up. Too many for her alone, and even too many for her regional delegates to keep track of. So I barely BARELY squeaked in under the deadline.

I offered to give up my spot, if only because my eating habits don't lend themselves to meals so much as three-ingredient-or-less snacks. I'll leave it up to Liz.
I'd not be changing much about what I'd normally be doing anyway.

Stew by numbers

Guess!

1) My car's average miles per gallon
a) 25.5
b) 32.9
c) 34.1

2) Inches tall, rounded up one inch
a) 61
b) 63
c) 65

3) Number of home-grown cukes eaten this week:
a) 3
b) 6
c) 9

4) Days past "sell by" and still tasty for my current gallon of milk
a) 5
b) 12
c) 18

5) Approximate hours I'll drive over the weekend pre-4th of July
a) 12
b) 15
c) 18

6) Dogs I've hugged in the last 36 hours
a) 3
b) 6
c) 9

7) Meetings I went to today to that were on my calendar wrong:
a) 0
b) 1
c) 2

8) Pairs of shoes readily visible on my bedroom floor
a) 0
b) 5
c) 10

A day of, well, nothing!

My body told me to sleep today, so I did. I got up at 7, went back to sleep around 8, slept until 10:30 and went over to pick up a few bags of leaves from a Freecycler for my compost pile.

Stopped off at the Food Feline on the way back, and scored 4/$10 DC. My main purchase though was some of those local peanuts I mentioned yesterday. Last summer at Nemoid's, I had some kick-ass bolled peanuts that I believe her husband had made. I figured I'd try them today.

I came back from the land of cheap D.C. and local green legumes, and did I don't know what. Then I realized I was supremely exhausted, so I went to nap. And I did. For four HOURS.

Anyhoo, I'm still tired. I had weird dreams that involved hidden relations with mafia-like men, tight quarters in a very cold and precarious aluminum clamshell disk flying above the land, unidentifiable birds, and navigations through the underbelly of a discount store.

I made pizza for dinner. Sauce: olive oil and garlic. Toppings: swiss chard and mozz. Tasty.

The peanuts are in brine in the crockpot.

Yawn!

Sooooooooooooooieeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Jerrypants and I headed out this a.m. for Hog Day, knowing we'd score us some good eats.


And we did, oh yes we did. In fact, we had to go back for seconds, me and Jer.

I ran into another friend of mine, M, who works in solid waste management as a recycling educator. She GOT my compost love. "Hey, Sue, Stew's got a 140 degree hot pile!"

M also helped me get a new arm adornment. Here I am showing it off. Can you read what it says?



As we went through the crowds, I was compelled (and this is hardly surprising) to snorgle every doggie I found. It began as soon as we got in, with a greyhound rescue organization, and eventually wrapped up with me flailing around on the ground with some poor other woman's puppy. See?


As we were heading out to get back to the car, we saw the "Got to be NC Big Cart," a 13 foot tall, 15 foot long shopping cart with a Chevy 386 V8 engine, which the NC Agriculture department is using to market (groan!) (I mean, grown!!) locally produced foods. I chatted the people up at the table, and learned that there's a really common local peanut producer (!!) I had missed. Also, Jerry asked what the main NC crop is. Do you know? Sweet potatoes. Yum.

Before we had even left for this adventure, though, Jerry and I came across the most intriguing sight of the day. Right there in Jerry's parking lot we saw this:


What in the world does that mean?????

_________

Thanks for the photos, Jerrypants!!

Alastair

It's the next-door neighdog who had the poison ivy on him!

THE DOG!

The dog who comes over to visit me just like my old next door neighdog did when I was growing up. Her name was Scupper. I like to pretend that Scupper is still alive. Scupper was a German Shorthaired Pointer, and she was named after Scuppers the Sailor Dog. I wish I had a scanner. I have a picture of me in a Lanz of Salzburg flannel nightgown, holding onto Scupper's neck. In her mouth is a dollar bill that her mumma had given her to bring to me. I have my big, pink plastic-rimmed glasses (like these but clear, light pink) on and a perm.

I'm in *college* at the time, oy.

I've never mourned Scupper--she's still alive. Right? RIGHT???????????????????

(Oh god, my doggie lust is just over the top at this instant. Alastair is really getting to me. Sweet cutiepie. He tends to be out in the early mornings when I wake up. When I step outside, he hears me and comes running for a hug and a pat and a snuggle. Damn urishiol!)

P.S. that dog looks like Scupper, not like Alastair

Oh. Mah. God.

I apparently mark the beginning of summer with poison ivy outbreak or four.

It's a total mystery to me where I pick it up. I don't really have it growing out back. Actually I did have one tiny plant I killed when I first spotted it several weeks back. But I don't roll around in it, nor have I even walked through it this spring.

I *have* walked near it. But come on. The urishiol doesn't fly around or anything.

My sweet little neckie and knuckles? Please feel better, ittle schnookums.

(N.B. The photo is from last year--the back of my knee. After I took the picture it continued to develop until the two patches met. Let's hope that doesn't happen again.

:-s

I'm starting to get concerned that I'm *that* guy. The one who has three topics that he recycles over and over again. Who talks a little loud and then wonders why people scoot away. Who drags people over to look at how neat it is that my, I mean his, compost is cooking at about 140º.

It STEAMS, people!

My topics:
Work
Garden
Compost
Birds
Dog?
Anxiety/Depression
Lack of dating/companionship
Sex Ed

Speaking of faith...

I was pleasantly surprised last night that, no, I hadn't been lured into a den of iniquity, and no, there was no monster lying in wait to attack my morals and be offended by my talk about sex. The lesson went swimmingly. The young people got as much out of an hour lesson as is possible. In other words, not all that much, but at least they now know what a dental dam is. I got great participation and after we finished? Applause.

Applause!

My favorite part, though, was at the very end.

"Dear Lord, thank You for bringing us together today to learn about STDs..."

Best grace I've ever heard.

Not just Baptist. MISSIONARY Baptist!

Tonight is my debut as a faith-based, comprehensive sex ed trainer. A Missionary Baptist Church in a rural town in the county where I work called a while back and said their young people had requested STD information at their Vacation Bible School. I explained our approach to their youth minister, and she approved (!!). We scheduled for tonight; this will be my first actual sex ed programming since starting this position.

Despite the church having secured parental permission (with no problems, either), I'm still wary. I'm experienced in dealing with tough questions from strangers, but I've never done this particular crowd before. Will they say something that offends me? I'm actually really looking forward to whatever might happen. Part of me just doesn't believe that they are progressive enough to accept frank talk about STD prevention that encourages, but is not limited to, abstinence.

I had a meeting this morning with colleagues from another organization that does comprehensive sex ed, and they couldn't believe it either when I told them what I'd be doing tonight.

Since I'm not at all a person of faith myself, I also worry about whether they're going to ask me about my opinions. I'm going to do my best to make it about their question and not my answer. Once when a middle schooler asked me where *I* went to church, I floundered a bit, and said "I live in Nearby City. I don't go to your church."

This is either going to be a kick-ass experience or an ass-kicking one.

We'll see!

Lab Write up

Abstract:
Limited computer usage corresponds with a higher level of accomplishment, after one day. Multiple regression analysis showed an increase in chores outcome was significant (p=.00143). Minimizing access to the World Wide Web did negatively affect subject's (n=1) ability to access necessary information(1), however. Subject's reported anxiety levels fluctuated from none to major. Net mean of anxiety level was below standard. Chores outcome measured by number of loads of laundry put away (two), number of kitchens entirely clean (one), number of dishes washed (14), number of wastebaskets emptied (three), number of lawns mowed (one) and number of new compost heaps created (one). Subject reported no positive social interaction, however.

Further studies will address long-term sustainability of the project.

(1) A Betty Crocker Cookbook, ca. 1989 substituted for an online database to find a suitable pound cake recipe. Subject then added almond paste, almond extract (pure), and chocolate chips. No appropriate recipe was able to be found for acelgas.

Experiment

I've been disturbed at how much time I've been spending doing nothing but refreshing my favorite blogs and websites, hoping there's something new to read. I think it's been making my anxiety worse.

Today, except for right now and maybe one other time this afternoon for checking email (say at 5 p.m.) I will not be opening my computer. I will pass my time today doing rather than being.

If you want to do something, which I'd really appreciate, please call me. Most of you who read have my phone number. Those of you that don't, mostly know at least one person who does. The rest of you I'll talk to at 5. If you've emailed, that is.

Today I will be mindful.

Voiceless pharyngeal fricative

Last night at bar-closing thirty o'clock, I woke up thinking my house was being broken in to. There were voices outside and someone was pounding on my door. Strangely, my first reaction was "Oh, that's not about me," and so I rolled over and went back to sleep.

Within a few moments, though, the incessant pounding woke me up again. I had a delayed "Holy FUCK!" moment, exacerbated by my having cruised the state's sex offender registry website that evening, just before going to bed*.

I went into stealth mode. I slid out of bed without turning the light on. I peeked through the blinds in my bedroom, and was NOT very thrilled to see a couple of someones apparently trying to break in next door.

While I scrambled for clothes (it's HOT!) and wondered whether to call 911, I suddenly understood what was going on. My neighbor, bless his heart, had probably locked himself out AGAIN. Sure enough, when I turned my bedroom light on, the pounding began again in earnest. I flipped on the back porch light and there he was: sheepish, extremely apologetic, and deserving an ass kicking.

He now has my phone number, and I no longer have his keys.

It's a damn good thing the dog is cute.


*I was trying to find crime stats by neighborhood, while researching where I could afford to buy a house. The sex-offender website was the closest thing I could readily find. If you can extrapolate general safety based on those results, I am somewhat less safe here than in my old town, but considerably safer than I'd be anywhere I can afford to buy.

******************

p.s. I'm not doing very well this weekend. I am overwhelmingly anxious. NOT scared, which is what I was last night. Anxious. On edge. It's affecting my ability to do things.

Uhhhhh

My compost has a temperature. It's at least 130º and is nice and damp. I'm kind of embarrassed to admit I hauled out my meat thermometer to get a reading. I'm fascinated with compost.

Today I interacted (i.e. exchanged verbal language) with:

• A guy on the phone who is running a study I might participate in.
• My friend Emily on the phone.
• The cashier at Big Lots.
• A woman in SuperCompare, who first explained to me what mamón is (the fruit, not the pejorative*) and then encouraged me to try one**.
• The cashier at SuperCompare.
• Two different clerk-types, a vitals-sign taker, a phlebotomist and my neurologist (doctor's appointment) at Evil Southern Private University Medical Center.
• My next-door neighbor.
• His dog. (That's stretching the "verbal language" part of my definition a bit, I know)

I have: green beans, eensy cucumbers, one wee yellow straightneck squash, several tomatoes, and thriving dill.

*Hm. I'm not sure that "fruit" contrasts all that well with the Spanish slang term.
**This thread of conversation is just ripe*** with opportunities for puns and misunderstandings.
***See?

I work therefore I...

...write?

I've been asked to keep a section of my organization's web page up to date with monthly "Hot Topics" about adolescent health. I wasn't really looking forward to it at first, until I realized that the request could be reframed and it would better appeal to me.

So. I'm BLOGGING FOR WORK, EVERYONE!

(Won't link to it here, but would be happy to email the website if anyone cares. I wouldn't if I were you. It's just going to be articles about teen health issues)

I just sent my ED the first article. About keeping cool in the summer. Avoiding heatstroke and sunburn...apropos, no?

Ring around the rosy a pocket full of -- spears

In THEORY they're coming to fix the AC "momentarily."

Meanwhile I can't seem to bring myself to be very productive. Yet I have a big deadline today. I asked to go home with my work, where I can at least shoulder the cost of keeping cool. But that's not yet an acceptable option, apparently. OH WELL. At least I'll be bonding with my coworkers who don't have as flexible of schedules as I do.

Oh yes, pardon that stray drip of sweat, ok?

The airco is out

I moved the condoms out of my office because I am afraid it's just not a cool, dry place. I, however, am obliged to remain inside.

Ninety degrees is a little much to tolerate; my office is like a greenhouse. Big windows with morning sun leads to sweltering morning temps. That means I do at least have a fan to get me through today.

Argh!

No Gus for me!

You'd think they'd at least know to send a shepard to live with sheep, right?

Nope. Goat farm.

From Gus's mumma:

When I got her email about you I had already gotten in touch with a woman w/ a goat-farm, which would be the best-possible-scenario for him (he's got herding in the blood!) but I know that you would be a great doggy-mom and he's a great boy so I would love to hook you two up if the farm-scenario doesn't work out. Should I keep you posted?

(sad face)

(I'm happy for Gus, though.)

For everything everything everything

Today is June 4th. The 4th of every month I've been celebrating.

Do you remember why?

Yup.

TEN MONTHS BABY!

Manna

I just made the best peanut sauce ever and decided to put it here for posterity.

Proportions are approximate at best

In a blender put:

3 inches of fresh ginger, sliced into manageable pieces
2 cloves of garlic, one big, one little, slice up too.
one inch of superhot fresh red pepper (mine is from maria's garden...serrano, I think)
1/4ish cup of soy sauce

Blend all up.

Add in to taste, a little of each at a time:

2-3 T peanut butter
2-3 T sugar
water
white vinegar

It should be your perfect combination of sweet, spicy, soy-ey, gingery, peanutty, garlicky, tangy sauce.

Only YOU know how much of each. Frequent tasting in the process is important.

I poured it on some japanese noodles and plan to add some swiss chard and maybe some sorrel and maybe some cabbage. Currently it's cooling.

*******

The robin lived, I think. The evil neighborhood cat had somehow gotten its chops on the bird and was guarding it when I noticed yesterday morning. I shooed the cat away and looked at the bird. There was no visible damage, other than shock. I went back to my porch and waited to see what would happen. The cat came back. I shooed it away again and went for some chicken wire. I was going to make a fence around the bird to keep the cat away from it. When I got back, though, the bird was gone. It had flown. Unfortunately the cat was now in the tree, in pursuit. I didn't even see it until I had spooked the cat away. I took my chicken wire back and monitored the situation until I had to leave for work. I have no idea what happened after that.

*******

The rain came soft and slow but thorough. We got at least an inch, but not in a damaging, run-off, pouring way. More in a steady, medium-weight drenching for a good 18 hours or so. I know we got at least 1.5 inches, though, so maybe it did pour profusely between the time I went to sleep and the time I woke up.

All's I know is that it's a start.

Growth

What's going on in the garden? Well, I'm so so glad you asked. What's that? You didn't ask? Oh well. here you go anyway.

I am in love. My garden is so cute. Somehow in the last week or so, plants have sprouted new fruits. I have eensy beans, tomatoes, and even one baby pepper. The swiss chard is glossy and red-veined and beautiful. The beet greens have turned out to be not green so much as burgundy. I read somewhere recently that this particular variety of beet is used as a dye.

If you've ever eaten too many beets at once, you'll know why.

The tomatoes seem to have gotten rid of their aphids, thanks to the insecticidal cottonseed oil I sprayed. I need to spend some time today looking everything over to make sure there're no new pests to manage.

The plants that have come from the seedlings I began inside are tending to be smaller and less hardy than the ones I bought when Jamie was here. I'm especially concerned about the Frigitello peppers; I'm not sure they've grown at all since I put them in 6 weeks ago. :-(

On the bright side, the Indian Stripe tomatoes I thought I had killed seem to have pulled through. One even finally has some buds on it! The patio tomatoes (Extreme Bush) are lush and green. So green, in the case of the one planted in a large pot in potting soil, that I realized it was probably time to prune them. You see, if the plant puts lots of effort into growing gorgeous foliage, there's less energy for the fruit. Which, as I'm sure you can imagine, is not ideal for my purposes. So I chopped off a couple of its arms. I'm still not entirely certain I can identify "suckers" (certain especially useless branches), so cross your fingers that I've not done too much damage to the plant.

It's supposed to rain this weekend. There's a tropical storm brewing, which is fantastic (so long as it's not too harsh). I've been irrigating my crops (heh. i like the sound of that!), so it's not like my garden is in harm's way (yet). But really, we need the rain. I hope I'm not jinxing it again.

The last laugh is indeed on me, though. I'm working this morning (after two 12-hour days in a row), and I'm also hoping the rain holds off long enough for me to cut my freaking grass. It's been two weeks, and the it's just too much for me. My front porch is also, apparently, under attack from some kind of very viny growth. I need to rip that out. I can do that in the rain, though. So I'll start with the...

Oh FUCK. I just witnessed a feline attack on a robin. Time to go rescue. Fuckity Fuck FUCK!