Look one last time before you go in, but you'll still miss it.

Why, yes, it is bigger than my entire forearm, thanks for noticing! Unfortch, a cuke this size is *not* what you want. The skin and seeds were more comparable to those of a cantaloupe than a pickle. I peeled it, cored it, separated the seeds out to save, realized that it was a hybrid and I can't save the seeds, and then made another jar of refrigerator pickles.

Then I hauled out the other 50 cukes I have on hand, and made some fresh cucumber kimchee. Note: Brine 1" chunks of cukes for an hour. Drain the liquid off, and lightly rinse off some of the salt. Cram as many as you can into a quart jar along with copious amounts of: 1) hot peppers 2) garlic 3) ginger 4) onions. Let stew for a couple of hours. Then put in a slog of white vinegar so you can pretend it's fermented.

Nom nom nom nom.

Eat only when you are alone.